Dating Advice

Are You Looking For Love in All the Wrong Places

Let’s say you’re single. But not happy about it. You’re tired of seeing everyone else fall in love. You want your piece of the pie.

So, you’re out there, looking for romance. It’s not easy, either. How sure are you that you’re looking in the right place? Maybe while you’re busy trying to meet people at the laundromat, Mr. or Miss Right is at work. Think about it. Romance can come from anywhere. Finding it is the hardest game you’ll ever play. And more often than not, it shows up where you’re not looking for it. That can really suck.

I’m not one who believes a lot in luck or fate, but you can’t deny that some of the most romantic stories you’ve ever heard happened by chance – the guy who met his wife at the party he wasn’t supposed to go to, or the woman who met the love of her life in the garage on the one day she decided to drive to work. So, as an idea, luck has some merit.

Just great. So you DO have to be lucky to find love.


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Not really. Unlike horse racing, this is one of those areas where you can make your own luck. All you have to do is be in the right place at the right time. Sounds easy enough, right?

So, where do you look for romance?

Nowhere. And everywhere.

It’s that simple. I’m not saying to walk around with flowers and candy on standby. Do you really want to sit back in a rocking chair someday and tell your grandkids that you were trying to pick women up at the bookstore when you met Grandma? Doubtful. I’m also not saying to sit around at home and give up on meeting people. Just realize that romance can be just around the corner, or at your doorstep. You just have to be willing to walk into it or open your door.

Dating services, as cheesy as they are, have been known to work once in a while. So have personals ads and meeting people on the Internet. Now, I’m sure you’re making a face. Shaking your head and thinking that only losers sink that low. And that any of those three is a sure-fire way to meet some psycho or freak. But I’m sure you know someone who tried the traditional ways of meeting people and still met weirdos and freaks. If you’re alone and don’t want to be, this is really no time to be stubborn. If you’re at your wit’s end, you may want to give them a try.

The other thing you may have to throw out are your rules – you know the ones –

  • “I’ll never date a short guy.”
  • “I don’t date at work.”
  • “I won’t go out with anyone I meet at the supermarket.”

If you accept that finding love is at least partly luck, you’re not helping yourself by eliminating sides of the dice you’re rolling. Your lover man may be in the cube next to you, or half an inch shorter than you’ve always dreamed. Your dream girl may be the bartender instead of the cutie on the dancefloor. Keep your eyes and your mind open. It doesn’t guarantee that you’ll find romance, or love, but it will definitely increase your chances.

So keep looking where you’re looking. And where you’re not looking. Leave yourself open, but don’t look desperate. That’s never good.

Oh, and if you happen to meet a few psychos along the way, don’t give up.

And don’t blame me.

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Kwame DeRoche

Kwame's witty style of writing always cracks us up. Sorry ladies, he's taken...but we hope you enjoy his insights into the male mind. This guy can write!

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