Here is some amazing insight that came about THIS MORNING during a coaching call with one of the guys who has put me to work for him. If you are into online dating at all (which you should be), you’ll want to pay close attention.
As you may know already, I talk a lot about how guys ruin their chances right from the start in their online profiles…simply by FOLLOWING THE DIRECTIONS.
It’s no secret to anyone who is successful online that Match.com et al really do not give out solid advice when it comes to helping us guys succeed on their site (which to this day amazes me to no end).
Essentially, they just try to give as intuitive directions as possible and leave us on our own for any real “strategy” other than “be nice”. Great…
So what do most guys do when they read the heading of the narrative section that reads, “About me and who I am looking for”?
You got it…they FOLLOW THE FORMULA as if it were an “essay question” from fifth grade.
Simply put, by doing so you all but SECURE your fate as a “comma chameleon”…relegated to writing out a comma-delimited list of how you’re funny, intelligent, spontaneous, etc.
In writing out such a list, you basically can make yourself out to be ANYONE YOU WANT to ANYBODY YOU WANT. Just fill in the blanks, and you’ve advertised yourself as all sorts of good things.
And you’ll be NO DIFFERENT than any other guy online…and therefore all but ANONYMOUS in a sea of other “also-ran” guys.
Now if you see a woman with a generic profile like that, you might just look at the pics and decide to write her anyway.
But had she written a truly socko profile that caught your attention in a “non-generic” way, my guess is that you’d be even more intrigued and excited to talk to her.
Well, here it is: Women are about 10X more interested in WHAT YOU WRITE than you are in what they write.
And “generic” is a mood-killer. They want a guy who STANDS OUT from the crowd.
And yes, this means breaking the mold of being a “comma chameleon”. You just can’t think in terms of “about me and who I’m looking for”…at least not if you want to get THE highest-quality women to write back.
So the big question is WHAT DO YOU DO INSTEAD?
Well, two weeks ago I brought up the somewhat preposterous assumption that Twitter.com could be the “next-generation” dating site.
I’ve since strengthened my belief that being on Twitter and actively participating can actually ALSO help your fortunes on sites like Match.com, Plenty Of Fish, etc.
For starters, I’ve come to the conclusion that “micro blogging” is the VERY ESSENCE of writing first e-mails to women.
How so? Watch what happens on Twitter very closely, and you’ll see people do AMAZING THINGS with 140 characters.
As you know, your first e-mails to women should be BRIEF. No “life stories” or drawn out, lugubrious missives desperately begging for a date or telling some anonymous chick she’s your “dream woman”.
The name of the game is “be interesting in two sentences”. Period.
The best way to do that is to cultivate your skill at being concise, even as you TAKE INTEREST in something you ACTIVELY NOTICED about her…and then present a CLEAR CALL TO ACTION.
This is what goes down on Twitter ALL DAY LONG.
1) Find something interesting someone said
2) Send an “@reply” with something that adds value to the discussion
3) Give a link featuring something the intended recipient should take a look at. This flat-out WORKS in the very social world of Twitter.
So if you get on Twitter and practice, you’ll have a MAJOR ADVANTAGE compared to other guys when it comes time to pinpoint something cool in a woman’s profile, ask her the right question about it in your first e-mail to her, and CALL HER TO ACTION in getting her to write back.
And you know what? It doesn’t stop at “micro-blogging”. I honestly think that the guy who starts treating his PROFILE NARRATIVE like a BLOG is going to be the guy who gets ALL the high-quality women.
And what blogger writes “about me and who I’m looking for”?
None, of course…that’s what the “about” page on WordPress is for. No doubt.
The BLOG POSTS are the blogger’s thoughts about life, issues, and what’s going on at the moment. After all, “blog” is short for “web log”.
Do you lead an interesting life? Are YOU viewing yourself as the PRIZE, instead of chasing women?
Then how about this: Start SHARING YOUR LIFE with women in your blog…err, “online dating profile”.
Talk about what you’re doing RIGHT NOW, like you would on Twitter. But you’ll actually have up to 2000 characters (or more) instead of 140. Nice.
Demonstrate what’s going on in YOUR REALITY, right here…right now.
I don’t care if what you write today stays up there a couple of weeks. If it’s what was going on in your life when you wrote it, then it’s going to be TONS more interesting and engaging than whatever some “comma chameleon” has scrawled elsewhere on his online dating profile.
If you need to speak you blog–I mean, “online dating profile”–into a voice recorder (which most cell phones have in them nowadays), then so be it. You want this to be written exactly as you talk in real life.
Twitter as a “training ground” for writing first e-mails? Blogging as a model for writing online dating narratives? I must be kidding.
Except I’m GUNFIGHTER SERIOUS.
So how about it? Ready to make Twitter your #1 free dating site? If so, you’ll enjoy Scot McKay’s FREE e-book called “Twiduction: How To Meet Women On Twitter“.
Stop by right now and Scot will personally send you a FREE 8-part mini-course ($47 value) when you sign up for the X & Y Communications Newsletter, which is always packed with unique and practical dating tips.
Also be sure to check out the The Chick Whisperer Podcast On iTunes.
Article Source: EzineArticles.com